What's it really about?

Today I've spent some time reading some websites that deal with organization, home management, clutter, etc. I don't think I'm ready to follow anyone else's plan very strictly (and thus, according to them, none of them will really work), but I read some things that have been helpful.

None of the places I was reading cover the whole picture of what I'm thinking about. It's not just about having a clean house. It's not just about being organized or trying to gain some sense of control. It's not just about having more time to spend doing what I enjoy, or being healthier, but rather a combination of these things. It's also about being a responsible citizen of the world... trying to learn to consume less and give more. It's not just about having a healthier body but a healthier spirit, and soul. I've gotten some ideas and motivation from these others, who have probably helped a lot of people, but none of them is really talking about exactly what I mean.

So I'm continuing to take it in small pieces, trying to have reasonable expectations, make a little progress everyday. Tonight I'm tackling the cleaning cabinet in the kitchen which has been bothering me for a while. It's kind of funny to clean the cleaning cabinet, but I'm hoping that an easier to use cleaning cabinet will make it a bit more manageable to clean in general.

More than specific projects, I'm thinking tonight about my motivation in all of this. In one of the websites I was reading she talked about blessing your family with your efforts. I so rarely think of it that way. That clean dishes and clothes are a gift to my family... that I do this to make our lives a little more comfortable, healthier, etc. I think so often in my head it's about meeting some standard, so that I and other people will think I'm a good wife, mother, person. Perhaps that's why I get so emotional about some of this... I'm assessing my own value based on my performance in some way. So in addition to wanting to make some changes in my habits or the way my apartment looks, I also need to make some changes in the way I think.